He's either a graphic designer or web developer, but he considers his band and artistic endeavors more important. In his eyes, his mother will always cook better than you, treat him better than you and, in some strange cases, look better than you.
He only eats organic food and is too pretentious to admit he was really effing excited about Trader Joe's opening up in Pinecrest. THE HOUSE HEAD He considers Space his second home and he's constantly going to random clubs to hear obscure DJ's spin the latest EDM jams EVERY.
She grew up getting everything she wanted, so you better prepare for a lifetime of bending to her will.
He has some impressive title that he backs up with his insufferable know-it-all attitude and extreme penny-pinching. He's dated half the city and is well on his way to conquering the other half.
THE KEY RAT He's probably a lawyer or real estate agent or therapist or financial planner living in Key Biscayne. No bottle of cheap vodka and some mixers is worth this type of treatment. THE MINOR CELEBRITY He's a well-known local musician, muralist or chef.
And he'll expect your panties to immediately drop, too. THE DOUCHE BRO Not to be confused with the private school grad, the Miami douche bro is usually found in his native habitat - the University of Miami campus or the Pike fraternity house at FIU. THE HIPSTER He probably lives in Wynwood or the Design District and spends a good chunk of his time at Wood Tavern and Gramps. THE SPORTS FANATIC The Heat, the Marlins, the Dolphins and his alma mater's football team. He'll drag you to every home game and expect you to rep just as hard. But sometimes you just want to go to brunch damn it. THE INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY He's obviously not from around here, but his cute accent and charisma will lure you in. THE MAMA'S BOY No decision will ever be made without momma's solid stamp of approval. He's in his fifth year at Miami-Dade and as long as someone washes his dirty undies and cooks him his arroz con pollo, he's set.
Mommy and daddy financed his education and possibly his start-up business. Interests include prescription pills, buying bottles at Liv, throwing up the U (whether he actually went to UM or not) and white girls (preferably the ones that are white girl wasted). He wears skinnier jeans than you do and doesn't even own a car. His nocturnal schedule is exhausting and the bags under your eyes prove it. He's not quick to provide many details about himself, what he does or where he lives, so you're preeeeetty sure he peddles large amounts of drugs or is involved in some other shady dealings. No girl will ever be good enough, so you might as well quit while you're ahead.
The two met on Zoosk, a popular online dating site. Susan Park: “I thought he was kind of looney about — how could he fall in love with me, as he put it, so quickly?